It's morning somewhere: Oh, the Horror! I had a rough day, ok?

Oh, the Horror! I had a rough day, ok?

Personals Forum: Dating Alert! old whitelady thinks the TV department at Sears is a hot date
Do NOT go out with old whitelady. Watching TV at home was kind of romantic for a first date, but the second date should have tipped me off when she pitched a fit because the restaurant hostess wouldn't give her the remote. The third date finished me off: bringing a bucket of KFC to the TV department at Sears may impress a TV addict but count me out. And the SHOWS she picked...
www.love-personals-online.com/forum/datingalerts/message4293
Firefighters thwarted while trying to save TV addict old whitelady from blazing inferno
"We were screaming at her to jump," said shaken firefighter Marty Heep. "The last thing I heard her say before the building collapsed was, 'Hold on, we're almost at a commercial.' It's a miracle she survived." whitelady agrees. "I was Touched By An Angel!" she said fervently...
www.hopeitwasntsurvivor.com
Profiles in Design: old "the Sloth" whitelady's Custom Couch: "The Incubator"
A couch-and-cushion Power User like old whitelady needed more than a stodgy floor model at Pottery Barn could give. Scientifically fitted to the contours of whitelady's back and hams, upholstered in beautiful Polyfur with the "Sticks at Nothing!" food-resistant coating, "The Incubator" has everything: butt-warmers, cup-holders, a napkin dispenser, and cushions that give like a fat lady's thighs.
www.reclinebydesign.com/researchlab/customclients/whitelady

Tornado touches down, leaves old whitelady's home cleaner than before
...pretty amazing!" Ms. whitelady told reporters. "The roof needs repairs, but otherwise the place looks better than ever!" Neighbors' reactions ranged from surprise to delight. "Look at old's front yard!" said letter carrier Roland Amado. "No dead cat, no mannequins, no Buick -- it's like a miracle!"
www.metrodailynews.com/HEADLINEs/394857
whitelady in Peril: Emergency Procedure Underway to remove 17 four inch spikes from human skull
"Of course I know how to use a nailgun!" said whitelady to witnesses just moments before the accident. Local paramedics arrived on the scene at 4:32 PM and were horrified to find...

# posted by oldwhitelady @ 4/02/2005 06:09:00 PM

Comments: Post a Comment

<< Home